Monday, May 9, 2011


I spent the first year after the stroke just trying to wrap my head around it. I walked, slept and tried to deal with these little limitation that keep manifesting themselves. Some where in the second year I started noticing that life was returning to some semblance of normal, not quite normal mind you but better than it had been in a year. At around 18 months I got the opportunity to go back to work on a part time basis and now that we approach the 2 year mark I am working nearly full time.

In the life that transpired during this, I lost first my father, and then a year and three months later, my mother. Both lived fully in their own rights and are now someplace arguing, my father with the drink in his hand and my mother trying to take it away, while Do You Love Me from Fiddler on the Roof plays in the background. Somehow we became a family of Russian Jews, land far from our Anglo and Germanic heritages.

But I am now realizing that I am in the third stage after the stroke. I am now rebuilding, with a passion. Some of what drives me crazy is realizing how preventable my stroke was. There were the two biggies, smoking and drinking too much beer, but I think that it is more related to diet.

Maria and I recently stayed in Providence, Rhode Island where she presented and worked at the American Society for Indexing conference. My Meg is also in Providence, in her final year at RISD. On Friday, Meg and I drove to Cape Cod to see an old friend. Meg and Steve are jewellers and jewellery and art monopolized a lot of the conversation, but Steve and I are also at that wonderful 51 year mark where things can go to hell or not pretty quickly and get harder to get back. We are both pretty active, he probably more that me, but have both felt some of time's wear and tear. He recently changed his diet cutting out glutens and dropped 25 pounds and claims to feel great. And he looks better. Meg also has been gluten free for quite a while, having any number of problems with wheat and milk,

So here I am a week into a gluten free diet. I could care less about the weight, I never weighed enough. I do care about the fat and I do care about any number of things that were continually bothering me. I am starved most of the time and learning this on the fly. But the TUM's bottle has not been touched in few days and I don't have an upset stomach much of the time.

There is more going on too, but I will save it for another night. Now that I am "recovered" I have this need to push myself and make myself better than I was. There are days my back is sore, I get exhausted and my knees don't work. Sciatica has reared its ugly head, slowing me down some, but most days there is no hope of running. But I am going to make myself better. I have a new bucket list and aim to stay alive to complete it.

And since I am never seen on facebook anymore, Happy Birthday Mr. Dwyer! a few days late.

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